About Me

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I am Steph! I am a 30-something mom and wife. I am Bi-Polar. I am an Autism mom. I work full time outside the home. I overcommit myself every single day. I sometimes wonder how my husband puts up with me on a day to day basis. I have 2 children, one neuro-typical and one not so neuro-typical. I am a hot mess. I am Steph.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Vinny.....oh Vinny.....How I love thee.....

Yes, I'm a closet Jersey Shore Fan.....Shut it....

Vinny has always been one of my favorites and now I know why.  Depression and Anxiety is often overused and can become kind of a cliche, so when I saw this video all I could think of was how I needed to share this with others!  As I have said in previous posts I struggle everyday with Severe Clinical Depression and Generalized Anxiety Disorder.  I often keep it to myself but it is very hard to deal with at times.  I started noticing at a young age that something wasn't right but didn't quite know what it was so I waited until I had a nervous breakdown before I sought out help, I love that Vinny has chosen to come out with his struggles.  I have high hopes that his video and website will help some teens and young people that are suffering as well but just don't know how to talk about it!

For once, Jersey Shore has produced something positive! :-)

Until Next Time.....


Tuesday, January 10, 2012

My Word of the Year

WORD OF THE YEAR:  This word is supposed to guide you during the year.  It is supposed to inspire you.  It is supposed to help you better define your life.  It is supposed to help you grow.  It is supposed to motivate you.  It is supposed to remind you of your priorities.

Instead of making a resolution and failing and getting mad at myself I am taking a different approach this year.  I am going to choose one word that will help guide me throughout the year to accomplish my goals.  My word this year is going to be:


What's your word of the year going to be?

Until Next Time...


Sunday, January 8, 2012

New Beginnings......hopefully.....

Last Sunday was my turn to Speak/Run our service at church.  Being it was January 1st, 2012 I chose to speak on New Beginnings and how God has instructed us to leave the past behind and grab the present and embrace it.  Well.....I'm sorry to say...that I am having a lot of trouble leaving the past behind right now.  I am normally the first person to say they are ready for new beginnings!  I hate living in the past and dwelling on things....but what I have noticed lately is that some of the things I keep dwelling on where really great times and memories and I just don't want to let them go yet....  I know I need to move on and live in the present and embrace what I have in front of me but my heart just wishes that I could go into the past, change things, make them better and then somehow bring them into my present and have it all.  I'm feeling a bit like a hypocrite....I preached my sermon to the congregation telling them what they needed to do and now I can't even do it....I don't know what is going on with me lately but I need a change.  I don't know yet what change is needed but I need out of this rut and out of this pattern I seem to be moving towards.  

Well, enough about me and my complaining....I thought I would share a bit of my sermon with you.  I hope and pray that you all have wonderful new beginnings in 2012 and amazing memories that you can "let" go of and not dwell in the past.  

Here is a bit of the sermon: 

Each of us resent something. We might resent something we have said and done, or we might resent what someone else has said and done. But along with resentment comes unforgiveness. And unforgiveness is a very dangerous thing to keep in our lives. Jesus said that if we forgive, God will forgive us. But if we do not forgive, God will not forgive us. Now, we must understand that to forgive does not mean the same thing as to forget. We cannot erase our memories, but we can erase our resentment. I would suggest that we just look at things from a different perspective. Instead of looking at your resentment from the negative side, start looking at it from the positive side. In other words, when you remember those things, as you surely will, look at them as an example of what not to ever feel again. Understanding where they will lead you should be enough encouragement to do so. So forget those things which hurt you. And forgive those people who did or said them. I like the old saying: “Look lovingly upon your enemies, for it is you who have made them.” We choose to dislike people, based upon what we like or think. We must realize that we are not the perfect examples, so we shouldn’t hold others accountable to our standards. Also, if you stoop low enough to begrudge others - - THEY WIN! So make a decision to leave your resentment behind right now.
Worries are very much like rocking chairs. They give you something to do, but they never take you anywhere while you’re doing it. We only worry about two things: Things we can change and things we cannot change. Why waste time doing something that not only hurts us and never helps us? When we worry, it ends up taking over our every thought and it becomes the predominate thought of our lives. Yet, it is also worry that causes mental illness, stress, and many other things that destroy our lives. Worry has killed more people than hard work ever did. Worry is the cause of fear. So, leave your worries behind as you enter the new year, too.
We try so hard to be the best we can be, but we don’t always succeed. And it is in those times when we don’t succeed, that we get discouraged because we have failed. But what have we failed in? We may not have achieved just what we originally set out to achieve, but we haven’t failed. The only time you fail is when you don’t try to do anything! We need to understand that God has called us to have faith long before He ever called us to achieve. We are called to be in Christ, and as long as we are in Him, we are successful. The ancient Israelites never seemed to get it right. They would all turn toward God and worship Him and everything in their lives would drastically improve. But after a couple of hundred years, they would turn their backs on Him again and see doom visit them and their nation. But, we are told that God will turn our failure into success, if we allow Him fully into our lives. 1 KINGS 8:33-34 says ‘When Your people, Israel, have been defeated by enemies because they sinned against You, and when they turn back to You and confess Your name, then You will hear from Heaven, and You will forgive their sins and bring them back to the land of their forefathers.’ When we as a nation, or as individuals, have strayed from our Lord, we will find failure in our lives. But when we turn back once again to Him, He will hear our pleas and He will restore us to success, for He is a God of restoration. As we leave 2011, we should pay close attention to the words of the Apostle Paul in 1 CORINTHIANS 13:5-6 ‘Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you realize that Christ Jesus in you – unless, of course, you fail the test? And I trust that you will discover that we have not failed the test.’
So, In other words, look deep within your heart. Is Jesus in you, or do you just acknowledge Him as you live the way you desire? If you try to live for Him, the way He wants you to live, then Jesus is in you and you have been a major success! So, as we head into a new year, make sure Jesus is firmly planted in your heart so He goes with you, covering you in God’s wonderful grace and blessings. And then choose to leave those things that distract you from realizing Jesus to the fullest possible extent. Imagine a trapeze artist swinging from one swing to another, high above the ground with no net under him. As he reaches out to the next swing, what must he do? He must let go of the one he is on. If he refuses to let go of the swing he is on, will he ever be able to go to the next swing? Absolutely not. And in the same way, we must let go of our old year before we can go purposefully into the new year. We need to let 2011 be fully completed. Let it take its rightful place in the hallway of the past. Whether it was good or bad, helpful or not, let it be complete by letting go of it.

Until Next Time.....