The Motions

This song has been weighing heavy on my heart today.....

Fitness Friday: 30 Day Shred

An AWESOME Bloggy Friend (Jen) of mine has started a Friday Blog post called Fitness Friday and I have been meaning to link up to her since she started and it seems like I either forget or can't think of anything to blog about!  SO, I'm so happy that I finally remembered before Saturday!  

If you have been tagging along with me along the last few months than you know that I have been on a weight loss/get fit and healthy journey so I'm going to use this post to update everyone on my progress.  I started working out consistently towards the end of July but I took my official "Before" picture in August and I'm using that to help document my body transformation because the scale hasn't been so nice to me lately!  

Here is the latest picture:

Can you see the difference??  The biggest change I can see is my "lower roll" has significantly shrunk.  If you don't know what part of the body that is I'll explain it a bit, lol.  If you look at my stomach, I have an "upper roll", a "tire" in the middle and a "lower roll"...sure the names aren't correct...but I have to have some sort of comic relief right!?

So.....I kind of fell off the C25K wagon (SUPER BUMMED) this month because I developed shin splints so I have been trying to nurse them because I REALLY miss running!  It's so weird to hear myself say that.  I mean, I'm still over 100lbs overweight but in the short time I have been working out I have accomplished things I never imagined that I could do!  And running was top on my list of things I couldn't do.  But I seem to be proving that list wrong everyday!

Because I couldn't run well at the moment, my sister and I started Jillian Micheal's 30 Day Shred.  

I would be lying if I told you it was easy!!  She kicks my B-U-T-T!!  We finished Day 10 (Level 1) on Wednesday and started Day 11 (Level 2) yesterday....All I can say is Holy workout! My results haven't been the greatest yet but I just keep telling myself that we aren't even half way done yet so hopefully I see some soon!  It would be nice if I could be one of them that loses up to 20lbs like she says on her DVD but at this point, I'm just happy with losing some inches!  So far I have lost 2lbs (I was at a 6lb loss but a few of those came back so I'm officially at a 2lb loss and a 1/2 inch on my hips.  

I'm excited to link to the other posts and see all the great things we are doing this week!  Come back soon, I will be updating along the way and I hope to soon introduce you to a smaller, healthier Steph! :-)

Until Next Time....

I'm just......here.......

I'm exhausted today....physically and emotionally...I'm not sure if I ever remember crying as much as I did today, I just couldn't stop it.  I couldn't control my breathing and calm myself down, it just wouldn't stop.  Kinda wishing I was somewhere nice and tropical and quiet right now.  Somewhere that I can just get away from it all for a bit.  Its just overwhelming and I'm not sure that I can hold it all together much longer.  I feel like I am working so hard to be a good role model and its just not working.  People close to me just seem to not care about anyone else but themselves and they keep making one bad decision after another.  What they don't realize is that it doesn't just affect them, it affects everyone around them and I'm tired of feeling like I'm the only one that is concerned about certain situations.  I'm tired of being called the bitch because I speak my mind and try to guide them in the right direction.  I'm tired of being tired.  I just don't understand it anymore, sometimes I wish I wasn't the oldest sibling so I didn't feel pressured to be the responsible one.  Why can't I do stupid things, be disrespectful and irresponsible and cause others pain?  Why can't I be involved in illegal activities and just think that I am invincible and that nothing is going to happen to me because I'm smarter than everyone and think that I know everything??  Why can't I just forget about my responsibilities and have everything handed to me and not actually have to work for anything?  Why?  Because I know better.  I have morals and beliefs and I'm entitled to my own opinion and you better believe that if you mess with them I will turn into the "Crazy Bitch" that you think that I am.  I used to think that you just made some mistakes in life because you were young and that you would learn from them but now I know that you will never learn.  You will never change.  You will never care about anyone but yourself and you will never care about who you hurt along the way.

I can honestly say that I'm just done.  I can't deal with it anymore.  I can't let my own family suffer because of stupid people.  But I also can't just sit back and watch all of this crap happen around me....What am I supposed to do!?!  Just shut my mouth and forget about it?  If something serious were to happen how will I be able to live with myself knowing that I knew what was going on but just shut my mouth?  How can anyone be ok with that?  How do people do it?  

I guess what I just need to do tonight is go to bed and start new tomorrow....but you better believe that I will not forget about this and I will not stop fighting for what is right. 

Until Next Time....

I need to get back on the Running Train....

Fat Girl Problems: My journey from fat girl to Runner Vol. 3

It's been a while since I have updated so I thought I would keep everyone in the loop!  As many of you know at the beginning of this month I started a 30 day challenge (Operation: LGN) with some online friends and we are nearing the end of our challenge!  Its a little bittersweet but we have decided to keep the group going so we will still be able to check in with each other and hold ourselves accountable!  With that being said, I wanted to share my "Before" picture that I took the day we started our challenge and a picture that I took tonight.  I was feeling some doubts that I was actually making progress but this picture just proves to me that my hard work is at least doing something!

I know its not much, but its MUCH more than I have ever been able to do before I started on this journey!  If you remember, I also started the C25K program about a week before we started our challenge.  I got to Week 4 of the 9 week program and then decided to start over at the beginning so that my sister could join me.  I have to say it was by far one of the best decisions I have made regarding my workouts!  When I first started I could barely jog 30 seconds let alone complete the entire day, we just finished our Week 1 and not only was I able to keep up with her (shes a skinny mini!) But I was able to complete it all!  I can't wait to see how far I get the farther we go in the program!  And it is just confirmation that I am actually making some progress towards my goal to become a runner!

Well, Ill end this since it is about 2am and I really should be sleeping but I was just too excited with my results to wait until tomorrow to share them with you!

I wish everyone a WONDERFUL Labor Day Weekend!  I personally plan to relax and spend time with my family, work out and eat healthier!

Until Next Time.....

Just Say No.....

To double chins.....I WILL have ONE chin and one chin only very SOON!! 

No Susan.....No they don't....

Until Next Time....

Drowning....

I feel like Im drowning in a sea of everything and I can't swim to the surface...... How do my fellow Moms keep it all together?

What I've learned since I started dealing with my Fat Girl Problems.

It's been almost a month since I have started working out consistently!  

Can I get a WHOOO HOOO!!!

And I am proud to say that I am still going strong!  

One of my fav Bloggers Jen started a 30 day workout challenge last week and of course we all know they needed a token "Fat Girl" to join the group! lol 

(just kidding....kinda....)

Well, I jumped at the chance to join the group, Operation LGN even though I was a little nervous to totally "put myself out there".  I did it....I uploaded my "Before" picture that night. Introduced myself and told a bit of my "Fat Girl Problems" story and left it at that.  I never in a million years thought that I would feel so loved, accepted and encouraged by a group of ladies (and one Tom) that I had never met!  In the past week we have checked in with pictures, workout plans, healthy recipes and funny or encouraging quotes! 

I have worked out 10 days in a row for at least 30 minutes each time!  And I feel like I am on fire!  I look forward to the evening when everyone goes to bed so I can take my C25K run/walk or ride my bike or work out on the Wii and I can honestly say I have NEVER felt excited to work out!  It truly is an awesome feeling and I am so thankful for all of the support I have gotten thus far! 

I wanted to end this blog post with a short list of things that I have learned since starting to work out, this seems to be a trial and error journey and although some things have been failures I have also found some things to be pretty comical after I think about it! So, here goes:

*I have learned that no matter what people say, when you are super fat, running down hill is not easier than running up hill.....It's all hard when you are carrying an extra 100lbs! 

*I have learned that you should never wear silk underwear and yoga pants if you want to keep you pants around your waist instead of your ankles while jogging. 

*I have learned that just because I couldn't do it a year ago doesn't mean that I can't do it now!

*I have learned that I need to buy a couple of sports bras before I start to run faster. 

*I have learned that when your stomach tells you that you really have to go to the bathroom.....don't keep jogging farther away from home....

*I have learned that sweat bands look really dumb on my head.

*And last but certainly not least, I have learned I CAN and I WILL do it.  

It may take me a while but it will happen! 

Until Next Time.....

I will.

Fat Girl Problems: My Journey from Fat Girl to Runner Vol.2

SO, I've started a workout log on the right sidebar of my blog.  I think I need it to hold myself accountable and to push me to try harder because I know that I can do it!  I've made some huge accomplishments this past week.  Firstly, I was able to pull both of my kids (Aprox. 60lbs) in the bike cart on my bike to my moms and back!  It was a total of 2.2 miles!  This is a HUGE accomplishment because the last time I tried to pull the bike cart Cady was around 2 years old and I couldn't do it.  I didn't even last 5 minutes let alone 2 miles!   To say that I was tired would be an understatement, but I was also ECSTATIC!  I have also been able to ride my bike (without kids) twice for 3 miles or more without stopping!  Tonight I pushed myself harder than ever and went 3.6 miles!  I should probably include that I have what is called a "Beach Cruiser" this is not your run of the mill mountain bike!  It is a cruiser, pedal brakes, no gears so to be able to pedal my fat ass is huge! 


The accomplishment I am most excited to share is that I entered into my second week of the Couch 2 5 K challenge!  Last week I wasn't even able to job through 60 full seconds.  I would go until about 40 seconds and have to stop.  Well, last night I went on my evening workout and changed my route a bit and I am proud to say that I was able to jog for the full 90 seconds EVERY time!  For those of you that don't know me, I am extremely overweight.  The last time I weighed myself (months ago) I was probably close to 280 so to say that I was able to jog for 90 seconds straight is HUGE.  I mean HUGE!  I have never been so proud of myself!  


I will end on a high note: I am feeling pretty good.  I am still tired a lot, I am still fat (lol) and I still don't eat as well as I should, but I feel better! 


Until Next Time....