About Me

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I am Steph! I am a 30-something mom and wife. I am Bi-Polar. I am an Autism mom. I work full time outside the home. I overcommit myself every single day. I sometimes wonder how my husband puts up with me on a day to day basis. I have 2 children, one neuro-typical and one not so neuro-typical. I am a hot mess. I am Steph.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Merry Christmas!

From Our Family to Yours!


Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Going through the motions....

Ever get that feeling that of "Why am I here??"  Feeling like you are just going through the motions to stay slightly afloat.....you're barely surviving the day...not totally sinking underwater but you're not on top either....That's how I feel right now.  I feel worthless, like I don't have a reason to function.  I feel like I'm failing as a wife, as a mother, as a person.  I have no energy, I don't feel like getting dressed, hell....I used to HAVE to shower every morning because I couldn't even leave the house and now I'm lucky if I get off the couch to take one every other day......I don't sleep. I don't do anything......just sit.  And stress.  And think.  And pray......

Monday, November 28, 2011

Decking The Halls....Yep...I am still alive....I think....

I haven't been around much in Blog land lately but I have been busy around the house Decking the Halls!  Since I should probably be sleeping instead of blogging I will just share some pictures with you for now.  Maybe Ill be able to get back to regular blogging sometime before 2011 exits and 2012 enters.......unless I loose myself in the huge pile of laundry that has been screaming at me for a week or so.....












We also had a little fun after all of our Thanksgiving festivities at our Community Christmas Around Town! Something tells me Nate isn't as fond of Santa as I am.....







Monday, October 17, 2011

Moments...

Its amazing how I can be totally exhausted, stressed to the max, angry, sad, happy...whatever, and my mood can flip around instantly when I hold my baby boy in the middle of the night to rock him back to sleep. For a minute there I thought to myself, "Lord, please give me a break and keep him sleeping so I can too!!" But I think God had other plans in mind because lately I have had some amazing reflecting moments in these wee hours of the night while cuddling! I have realized that these cuddling moments aren't going to last forever...so I need to cherish every single one of them. Thanks to the Kindle app on my phone I have been able to start reading again while rocking him! I have planned my day, thought about dinner, mentally chose Cadys outfit for school in the morning...all things that Im not totally able to do when I don't have time to sit and think....but most importantly, I have come to realize that in these quiet moments cuddling with my babies God reminds me that life is precious and I am one lucky girl! 

Friday, October 14, 2011

My Life via Facebook...

One Question:  How on earth do my fellow mommy bloggers find the time to blog!!??!?!  I have been SO busy lately!  I thought it would be fun to share what I have been up to via all of my Facebook statues and Foursquare check in's since the last time I blogged....I apologize in advance if there are a lot....lol  I have an addiction to FB.


Starting Oct. 7th since my last blog was on the 6th: 

~Yep...I just fell from the top of my stairs all the way to the bottom...ouch....Let's hope I don't hurt too much in the morning....
~Really feeling the fall right now.....ugh....can barely move....
~Im probably going to delete you soon cuz youre annoying. Just saying....
~Dear Nate, please go to sleep....nuff said....
~I don't really feel sorry for the wives on Sister Wives feeling like they don't get enough time with their "Husband"....HELLO dummies!! You're sharing your "husband" with 3 other women!!! Of course you're not going to have him all to yourself!
~Hey Nate....I love hanging out with you.....but please go to sleep my love.....
~Am I the only one not watching football tonight...You are all missing the sexiness of male dancers on Dancing With The Stars! Lol
~Heading to MOPS for the first time....wish us luck! Lol
~Hanging outside enjoying the weather while I let the kids sleep a little longer in the car......
~Im in bed before midnight? I feel like I didnt accomplish anything tonight except see who was voted off DWTS...wait...that's cuz I didn't...
~Why did I just stay up until 130 watching Kim Kardashians wedding??!?! 7am will be here in no time....ugh....
~Wow.....Im exhausted.....
~Cady is singing Adele in the back seat....I love this girl....
~I'm putting the kids to bed tonight and Cady says to me: "Mom, I want to make my mark on the world with my dancing." Wow....is she 4 or 14.....???
Foursquare Check In's 
Oasis Family Restaurant
Ambrosia Vae Dance Studio
Brann's Steakhouse and Grille
Target
FireKeepers Casino
McCamly Plaza Hotel
JW Barleycorns
Great Start Readiness Program
Big Lots
TR Church of the Nazarene
US Post Office
Meijer
McDonald's
Great Start Readiness Program
Crossroads Mall
Pride Mart
Kipker Residence
Steak N Shake
Hobby Lobby
Walmart
Kipker Residence 
Kids Gym
Shell
Hightree Homestead
And I know there is more....I just got so busy I forgot to check in.....ugh.....

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

One Week.

As I sit here trying to decide if I should go to sleep because I have a headache or get up and clean the house a bit I suddenly feel like I am being hit with a load of bricks......I have exactly one week until two HUGE events happen in the Hightree House. 
Tuesday the 20th marks Nathan's first birthday AND Cady's first day of Preschool!! 
I can't help but be both excited and sad at the same time.  I am just in awe by how fast this last year as flown by.  At some point I feel like I have been so busy that I have missed part of the year....but then I look back at pictures and memories and realize that I was there....apparently it was just all a blur....

I am just baffled by the fact that my baby boy is 7 days away from being 1 year old.  I know it sounds corny and we say this all the time, but I truly feel like it was just yesterday that I met him after only pushing for 10 minutes!!  I feel like he has grown so fast and I am so blessed to have seen every milestone thus far but I am also a little sad....I miss my newborn....I don't think I got enough time with him alone as a newborn.  And it makes me sad.  I just wish I could go back, cuddle him some more, take more pictures, kiss his tiny sleeping face and then come back to reality.  I guess it comes with the territory of having more than one child.  I'm sure its a mom thing to never feel totally accomplished.....but it sucks....that's all....

On top of my mommy sadness that my baby is turning 1 I also have to deal with the fact that my little girl is not so little anymore....I know she is only 4 so its not like she is a teenager or anything, but she is starting school in a week!  SCHOOL!  3 hours a day for 4 days a week away from Mommy......WHAT on earth am I going to do!?!  She is both excited and scared at the same time and I am both excited and devastated at the same time.  My little girl is becoming a big girl.  Part of me is super excited to start the school activities that come with having a school-aged child and the other part of me is not quite ready yet.....I don't want to share my baby....I don't want her to rely on anyone but me....I don't want her to like her teacher more than me or go to her when she is hurt on the playground.......but then I am also happy that she will be able to learn to trust someone other than her parents and grandparents.  She needs that interaction with other kids and adults and she needs to learn in a different environment to learn new things.  But I sometimes wish I could just go sit next to her at her table and pretend like I'm not really there....at least for the first week or so....lol....

I'm sure all the feelings I am having right now are normal.....I just wish I could experience them at different times.  This wave of emotions all on the same day is not ideal....

Well, my head is starting to hurt a bit more so I guess I will hang it up tonight and go to bed....just a warning though, if you happen to see me bawling my eyes out on Tuesday morning don't think anything of it.  I'm just being a Mom.

Until next time,

Thursday, September 1, 2011

She went to bed a 3 year old and will wake up an Adult!

I remember this day four years ago just like it was yesterday.  As I am typing this blog I look at the clock and it is 11:01pm....4 years ago today I was 1 minute into "pushing" our new baby girl out to join the world! :-) I pushed for an hour and 21 minutes before she graced us with her presence....and our lives haven't been the same since!

My beautiful baby girl Cadence May was born September 1st, 2007 at 12:21am.  


video

In the past 4 years I have been pooped on, puked on, peed on, licked, bit, kicked, smacked, yelled at, got called names and I'm sure much much more!  But I have also been hugged, kissed, filled with laughter, joy and love.  I have heard "Momma, I Love You", I have been needed, my shoulders have been cried on, I have nurtured and taught more than I could ever have imagined. 

Words can not describe how much I love this little girl.  She has changed my life for the better.  It has been stressful and fun and the most rewarding experience of my life!  She is a little diva.  She is funny, smart, beautiful, loud, glamorous, caring, helpful, shy, kind, happy, silly, talented and independent.  Every single day I ask myself why I was so lucky to have her in my life.

I am having a mommy moment right now because she is growing up too fast....she is starting Preschool at the end of the month, tumbling classes that don't include mommy next week, dance class in two weeks....she is turning into a big girl before my eyes and the next thing I know she will be an adult....It's both exciting and devastating at the same time....Since I have started rambling I am just going to share some of my favorite pictures from the last 4 years.  Don't worry...I won't overload you with pics!









Ok....I fibbed....I may have bombarded you with pictures.... :-)  Since I got caught up reminiscing while looking through old pictures it is now 12:06am.....only 15 minutes until my Birthday Girl turns Four!!

I Love you baby girl! Happy Birthday!

Friday, August 19, 2011

Skyscraper

Sometimes this is exactly how I feel....
 
"You can take everything I have
You can break everything I am
Like I'm made of glass
Like I'm made of paper
Go on and try to tear me down
I will be rising from the ground
Like a skyscraper, like a skyscraper"

I Heart Demi Lovato......

Nuff Said....

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Yep...I'm Ready....

I'm Ready for Fall.....
 

I'm Ready for Apple Cider and Donuts.....

I'm ready for Apple Picking and Pumpkin Patches....


I'm ready for fall decorations....



I'm ready for cooler weather so we can actually enjoy playing outside....
 

I'm ready for sweatshirts and cuddling on the couch under a blanket.....

I'm ready for Cady to start Preschool and for Tumbling classes to resume.... 

I'm ready for us to get out of Summer mode and get into some type of schedule....

I'm ready for Beef Stew and Chili...lol


And most of all I'm ready for some Quiet Time before the Holidays knock on my door! 

Monday, August 15, 2011

Weekend Camera Roll

2nd addition to Weekend Camera Roll!