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I am Steph! I am a 30-something mom and wife. I am Bi-Polar. I am an Autism mom. I work full time outside the home. I overcommit myself every single day. I sometimes wonder how my husband puts up with me on a day to day basis. I have 2 children, one neuro-typical and one not so neuro-typical. I am a hot mess. I am Steph.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Control.....

So, I'm officially in the middle of my 3rd week of being a Stay at Home Mom. I have to say, this is SOOOOO different from anything I have ever done!! I LOVE IT!! Not only have I gotten to spend so much time with Cady I have also spent a lot of time with my mom and some friends that I have missed! I have also been doing a lot of reading and meditating and learning more about my faith with Jesus. I have come to realize that I need to stop trying to control everything. I need to let Him take control and lead me in the path that he wants me to go in. I have been listening to a lot of music lately and this song by Francesca Battistelli has been like a theme song for me!! I'm officially letting go and giving him the reigns! Here are some of my favorite lyrics:

"I'm Letting Go"

(Chorus)
I’m letting go
Of the life I planned for me
And my dreams
I’m losing control
Of my destiny
It feels like I’m falling and that’s what it’s like to believe
So I’m letting go

This is a giant leap of faith
Trusting and trying to embrace
The fear of the unknown
Beyond my comfort zone

(Chorus)

Giving in to your gravity
Knowing You are holding me
I’m not afraid


I'm not afraid anymore, I have no idea where my life is headed. I have no idea what I will be doing in an hour, tomorrow, next week.....I have no plan whatsoever! And I feel better than ever!

2 comments:

  1. That's so great Steph! I love her music too! Her "Free to Be Me" is my one of my favorites. I'm glad that you have had time to work on your relationship with Jesus. We all need to make time for that and I'm sure he has wonderful plans in store for you!!

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  2. I got a couple dents in my fender, a couple rips in my jeans!!! I LOVE that song too!!!

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